Levels of Relationships...

Relation ships between individuals can at times get messy and intertwined, which can itself create numerous problems in front of them. And this is no exception to me as well and here i put forward my theory on a relationship.

First I will categorize relationships as 3 levels. These levels are categorized keeping in mind only for a long term relationship. Why only long term?Because the complexity adds on only in the long term and that's when one realizes the depth in relation. Also one might ask what is the criteria for the categorization. My criteria would be the openness of a relationship. In my view, this is what is needed when one is in a relationship, that's what will give the trust and confidence on one's partner and that's the basic building block for relationships.

1. Perfect: In this level of relationships, either of the two will share every thing about themselves to each other. They have no secrets and its an open relationship. These typically are what one call the close friends or lovers etc. Because perfect relationships often take lots of resources from both individuals and having many perfect relationships itself cannot be sustained in a long term. And one might ask no secrets means what? This is where we get into psycho analysis. Sigmund Freud quoted that "To truly understand a person, one has to understand not only conscious thoughts but also unconscious ones which are sitting in the ID in Freudian terms and bodily desires of the other". The unconscious thoughts can be known from interpreting dreams. If the understanding of sexual desires and unconscious thoughts is clear, that's when one can say its a perfect open relationship :) So a relationship at this level today may not be at the same level any more unless one dedicates time to maintain the understanding of conscious and unconscious thoughts of the other. (This is the reason why Its tough to get committed!!) If this maintenance is not done, soon in long term, there will be complete level drop from perfect to semi perfect state which is explained below. This is the typical case of after marriage boredom which couples generally face.

2. Semi Perfect: In this level of relationship, either of the two share certain things and do not share others and both of them know that this is the case and a fact. Both the individuals accept this fact and compromise themselves with that. These individuals are open only to certain topics and not open to others and both accept this fact. This is the most typical one. And please don't think that this is not good. This level of relationships are absolutely essential for an individual unless he loves being lonely. But these are like replaceable ones(of course time is needed!!) as they do not have the depth which a perfect relation has.

3. Now there can be another level in between these two levels, perfect and semi perfect. Like for example, A in relationship is totally open to B but the vice-versa is not the same. This kind of levels cannot be sustained typically in long term. Either A will get mentally hurt because of inferiority and finally goes back a level to move away from relationship or B will realize certain things and step up the level to bring it to next level (which generally is not the case by the way). Even if at this level it sustains, It will not look good for either of them at various points of time. This will more or less cannot be sustained in a life time but the first two levels can be sustained in a life time of an individual!!

feeling too much theory? chill madi :)

Hope every body gets at least one perfect relationship ;)